1: Don't panic Squirrels can be very intimidating, but remember; they are probably just as scared as you.
2: Don't feed it Being confronted by one squirrel is daunting enough. If you have bread crumbs or nuts with you, do not offer them to the squirrel in the hopes that you can sneak away while he's eating, because what you will do instead is attract more squirrels.
3: Square your shoulders Face the squirrel directly and adopt the following pose: legs spread apart and straight, hands on hips, staring straight ahead, looking vaguely bullet-proof. This pose is universally understood by squirrels to mean "I am Superman." (This pose works just as well for women, as squirrels can't tell the difference.)...
If you would like to see
the rest of this chapter...
Order your copy of The OTHER Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook today!
Also included:
How to Survive A Shark Attack
How to Conjure Up A Demon
How to Find Jesus
How to Survive A Trip to Disney World
...and much more!
 |
|